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Time For change

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Dec. 14th, 2006 | 02:25 pm
posted by: smooow in heroin_support

Its been awile since i last updated so here goes.

I have moved out of the Bronx`s (uk slum) and im living with my girlfriend and her mum in a realy nice part of leicester..
this has realy realy help with what i am going through. the place i was living was totlay doin g my head in and makikng me more and more stressed, noice was a big problem and being woke up in the morning everyday by chaves and barking dogs was not my idea of fun.

I have decided to go away into the wilderness in the new year with a friened of mine who is also on subbys we going to go away and stop takikng the remainder of our tablets and go cold turkey in the wilderness, Nature will help us through the final path, i realy need to get my shit together and do this i cant keep taking tablets everyday. its doing my head in as well.

More abut the trip when it happenes, another of my friends has just recently got himself into amphetamin abuse aka (Speed).. I think this is such a destructive drug, its corosive and rots away your body from the inside out. (H) on the otherhand has been known to preserve the body.
One of the main problems with speed is the psycossiss that happens when you dont sleep for days, you start seeing things out the corner of your eyes and hearing voices, so if you do have any slight mental health issues this will make the whole thing ten times worse.

Last year i managed to get hold of some realy realy realy good 100% pure speed known as (BASE)
and me being me set about scoffing loads, i dident qwite realise how strong this stuff was and took 3 PEA sized bits. I was up for a good 48 hours and my heart felt like it was about to smash through my rib cage. this was not the only problem, i was workikng some magic at the time as well and managed to catapulkt myself into another dimention or inner space and made contact with another instance of myself and he was showing me everything they had in there world, they were so much advanced then we were the whole thing was totlay life like.

i will go into what happened in that dimention another time but lets sya i had problems getting back to this reality. and when i did manage it. i hit psycossis in a very big way, i started freekikng out and running round my house i was being attacked by an entity from that unverse.
I then ran out the house without anything on my feet, i made it uop the road to burger king and started freekikng out in there, they took my mobile of me and i asked them to call my girlfirnd at the time and she came down to get me.

I was proper gone with the fairyies and needed help bad so i called another friend of my who is a psyciy nurse and he got me a cab to his house rather than the hospital and he gave me some drugs to bring me down and i slept then for a day or so.

the whole experiance totaly warped my sence of reality, its something i never wish to experiance again, and something i have lived to tell the tail off, my relationship with speed ended that day, i know i will never take that stuff again i have noi need to i have been to the end with it and have nothing more to see, i kinda feel that way about (H) now that our time together has ended. The price for useing is two dam high now and i have so much more to live for.

this i feel is whats needed when coming of (H) you need a reason to live for if you dont have one you wont get of (H) everyone needs to find something to hold onto, (H) takes away your current life and gives you a new one like being a vampire, you are still alive but totaly diffrent you need to feed(TAKE H) or drink blood.

I want to write about what i saw in that place i visited as it was so totaly crazy, i do belive that there are parralel universes out there, we just need to find was of getting into them without blown our minds with drugs.

To all the new members of this group, how about posting somthing here, anything will do. lol
Happy happy xmas to everyone.!!!!

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Comments {1}

Le Femme Invisible

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from: maybeimamazed
date: Dec. 14th, 2006 08:45 pm (UTC)
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before going into the wilderness...

you know yourself best, and i agree that nature is the best medicine...

but give yourself a few days off the subs first. i attempted to kick cold turkey in the wilderness. it was raining and cold. and the anxiety and discomfort was so intense i thought i'd lose my mind. i was in no place to even appreciate the fact that i was outdoors in one of the most beautiful old-growth forests on earth...

and on a stranger note, a few days into it i ran into a hiker in the woods (and i was in a truly remote part of canada deep in the mountains) who asked me if i needed help. i certainly did. he had H. you can imagine where it went at that point. the snake starts eating its tail once again.

i spent a while in the wilderness after my body was feeling normal though and it reminded me how beautiful this place really is.

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